Recovering Pop addict

Hi my name is Erin and I am a Diet Pepsi-aholic

I have always been a diet pop drinker, it was always was in the house, I was always allowed to drink it in fact I never drank milk or juice always diet pop. All the way into my adulthood when I realized what an addiction it actually was. If I would go without a pop for several hours I would begin to get a headache, my co-workers would joke "uh oh Erin hasn't had her pop yet this morning, watch out!" It was a staple on my grocery list. I would have a swig of pop first thing in the morning, drink a whole 710 ml bottle by noon, have another one at lunch, one a dinner, and one or more in the evening till bed. In one day I was consuming up too 5 bottles in a day.

If anyone ever commented on my addiction I would answer that there were way worse things to be addicted too. It's not like anyone was ever arrested for driving under the influence of soda, I never missed work because of it and no one my family had staged and intervention. So there. It was a vice that wasn't really that bad. I loved the drink. But I made a decision to give it up. That sure it wasn't so bad but it was an addiction, I needed to stop. So despite my hatred for New year resolutions the date is pretty symbolic for changing something in your life, I chose to quit drinking pop.

I drank my last Diet Pepsi at 15 mins to midnight. I am now 20 days out. It wasn't easy. The first four days I had this fuzzy headache feeling. I was absolutely exhausted the first week, because I was also giving up caffeine since I don't like coffee. I was in bed by 9:30 pm each night since I could barely keep my eyes open. Luckily I didn't have too many mood swings so I wasn't unbearable to be around. What I have noticed is that since I got over the withdrawal my mood has generally stabilized no more highs and lows during the day. I have been going to bed at a normal time and having an easier time getting up in the morning. And I am saving money which is always a great motivator for me.

The slippery slope

Well What took me a year to lose took me six months to gain almost all of it back. The last six months have been one big disaster. Now there was no big trauma or life altering problem that shot me off track, It started off slow, I was very busy in July working two jobs. Even though this was short term it wiped me of energy. I stopped going to the Gym. But I would always start back tomorrow. Then in August there was a slew of birthday parties to attend, barbeques to go to sure I had gained 10 pounds but that could be fixed I would start tomorrow. I would always start tomorrow. Then 30 lbs had climbed back on my body and I was beginning to feel like a overstuffed sausage casing, I was feeling terrible, I couldn't face going to the gym, or even coming to read blogs I was exhausted all the time. But I would start next week back on track. Then in November I hurt my ankle really badly and was hardly able to walk on it for weeks, I said screw it I'll start in January. And here I am. I gained back 50 lbs in six months.

very very very bad eating day

Well it all started off on the wrong food with breakfast, I didn't know what I wanted, and I didn't feel like cooking anything so I lingered in the kitchen and started popping anything in reach in my mouth. And this continued on all day. But nothing was satisfying me, I just wasn't eating what I wanted, but i didn't know what I wanted. ugggh! I think there are a few reasons why I had a bad eating day, I ended up working overtime saturday which just added to the overtime I racked up this week so I was exhausted today, I didn't even hit the gym or make any effort to preform anything but the most necessary functions. Also there was some emotional eating component involved.

But on a positive note, I could have just ignored my less then stellar behavior and skip tracking but instead I tracked it all, not until the end of the day (maybe if I had done it sooner I would have stopped, but I doubt it!) and the total wasn't pretty, but at least it was honest.

Tomorrow is a new day, I cannot erase the calories I consumed today, but I can control the ones tomorrow. One off day is not a disaster. Oh and I will be leaving work on time and get my butt to the gym tomorrow night.

Weigh in Wednesday

I got my reward! 4 lbs down. Down to 315.

That is one pound less then what I dropped down to in 2007 and I think that means I am at my lowest weight since 2001.

Had a great week, hopefully it will show on the scale

My weigh in day also happens to fall on my day off of work. I don't know if it is the fact that my schedule is different on Wednesdays, since I get to sleep in etc, I always find that on my day off I tend to retain water, I can't get my rings off easily, which doesn't bode well for the scale. But if I had a weight loss, I should still be down water weight, or no water weight.

But I did have a good week. I exercised, my calories were in or close to the upper range. I generally feel really good about my progress. My snacking was reigned in and rice cakes did sneak back in the house but they remained uneaten. And I am proud that I managed to pass by the banana marshmallows twice without buying them. I cannot have them in the house, it is way to easy to justify to myself that it is okay to have just one more. I swear my brain recognizes sugar like a drug.

Banned

Hear ye! Hear ye! These items are henceforth banned from the premises:

Peanut butter


Rice cakes (all flavors but especially butter toffee)


Marshmallow Bananas


Maria cookies


For crimes against Erin's healthy eating goals. The exhile begins immediately for an indeterminate period of time, when you are no longer as dangerous to said healthy eating goals the ban may be revoked.

Weigh in Wednesday

One pound gain. Considering the humidity and the fact it hit 32 degrees today (Celsius) I was swollen up this morning and was unable to get my rings off. I did have a few bad days this week, mostly at night with snacking. But it is time to start getting that little problem under control.

Up to 319 lbs.